Ha! Did this Twitter message bring you here: “The Post you are about to read shall be up for only 3 hours after which it shall be subsequently taken down! Enough said.RT for general good ”
If it did, first tell youself “I’m a gbeborun”, second, applaud my “get them to read tactics”, third, it feels like April 1st all over again innit? Buhahaha…
Anyways, great to have you here again. The piece below ought to have come up on saturday but well…I wasn’t done and 2. I was ‘moved’ to do the ‘Winning’ post based on the blog awards thingy. Here’s thanking everyone who voted and made this possible. Y’all rock…here we go then…
“Water, e no get enemy!” Famous lyrics of a very famous song! However, recent occurrences have caused me to wonder about the truth in these words. Am I saying that the famous Fela was a false prophet? NO!! I just don’t know any fella called Prophet Fela…do you? I thought not!
So, it was a Sunday morning and as early as 6am, the heavens began to weep! What started off as just normal sobs eventually turned out to be something akin to a Mushin raised child crying because he stole meat from the pot that morning, was caught and was told the dreaded words: “Wait till your father gets back!” You know that feeling right? When you know your father will beat the hell out of you and the thought of it makes you cry from the moment you hear it till the moment he walks in! Yup that’s how the rain ‘cried’ all day.
It didn’t even help that it was a Sunday and church choirs couldn’t just decide to be smart…they decided to go ‘with the flow’, singing songs like “Open the Floodgates of heaven”, ‘Let the rain of your presence fall”, “Showers of blessings” amongst others…As the rains increased, I’m sure these choristers must have felt ‘at sea’ with the effect they had made. However, I doubt even their faith could have prepared them for what lay ahead.
Yeah, we’ll get back to Sunday but let’s review the events of epic Saturday, shall we? The saturday when a certain blogPost shook the foundations of the Twitter community..For those of you last carriers who didn’t get to read it, fear not! Its not deleted, its privatised. Once we get sponsors, we’ll put it out again (and wow,, them voltrons went in hard on the comments mayne..lol).. I’ve been asked for my side of d story too often, what’s here is an abridged summary though..
Woke up in the morning and I get off my feet, say a Thank you prayer and I grabbed my phone to tweet…(lyrics fail me here).. .moving on… then I saw the subs…Ha!!! They were like missiles from left, right and center..”…sore Loser withanL” WOW! This is what Libya must feel like, I thought to myself. So I walked to the dining area and settled to breakfast, scrolled through my TL and took it all in with a pinch of salt…lol. Them subs kept coming and now even more directly.”Na me be this? Oh Lawdy Lawd!”. Here’s the thing yeah?
“Power isn’t determined by how hard you hit when pushed to the wall, but how well you can refrain from hitting!”
Let’s just say that I could be a good power horse advertiser..haha! Through all the insults and abuse, my concern was for Slim and how she must be handling it, oh! She was strong through it all, though she almost cracked and wanted to respond at some point! (Me too sef)..safe to admit that some things written in the post could have been avoided (no doubt) but I ain’t/wasn’t gonna cower and leave her to herself. HECK NO!!! (But mehn, you guys can yab sha! I mean from whence came all the creativity?) Some people who hardly tweet became all so vocal, it was really nice to see..Kai! There were some who changed handles! Jeez!! I was too slow, woulda claimed ’em!!
Oh! It was a good day, I got calls from strangers, some applauding, some threatening, one revealing *wink*, Pings every second, my blog had its highest visit count ever 3241 in a day and she had 5425 at last count. More people subscribed, and as is common in cases like this, follower count increased..S/O to all new followers..God go make you Bigger!
Unfortunately for me, my battery ‘died’ at about 1pm (curse you BB!) and I missed out..i returned much later after charging to see that #WithAnL was trending…yay! Me!!! It wasn’t just trending in lagos, it was trending WORLDWIDE (Check Trendsmap.com for details)…haha. I wonder if this was what the Bible meant when it said “your name will go places your feet haven’t” (paraphrased). While all this was going on, my ‘boys’ were eating at some wedding reception (weldone o! Vic, Femi and Toks) , my own voltrons were missing, basically non-existent (please how can I recruit voltrons? Pls apply within abeg). Slim and I felt like Bonnie n’ Clyde..it was “we against the Tworld” and the Tworld seemed to be winning *sniffs* S/O to @SamanthaSiren for having our backs though!
Anyways sha, there were lessons learnt, friends, haters and enemies revealed. yeah! I see you…the most painful was when someone who I considered a ‘friend’ took so much pleasure in cc-ing me into some particular tweets and subbing the shit outta me! (Yeah you) E pain! I no go lie!!! I’m off that though but the ‘friendship?’…nah, don’t think its worth it!
Anyway, like every other Twitter issue, we are on to the next one! And oh! The theories that arose were just hilarious..PS: My post ‘SERIOUSLY 1 and 2’ has NOTHING to do with TPN.
So, the rains poured down all day and the whole of VI looked like the scenery for TITANIC 2. I’m like WTF? (What tha flood?) Someone had asked “God why?” and I wonder if God was thinking, “if I could just find one Noah in VI to build an ark”… but do you know anyone by the name Noah in this time and age? My thoughts exactly! Its funny though cos while many were stranded as a result of the floods, many others in the comfort of their homes were making good use of the weather! S/O to the kids that will be born on April 20th 2012. Me I was at GET Arena literally chilling with my boys (@freshPrinzVick, MallamSawyerr, OlaToxic and jonNeski), girls (stephHailey, d3ola, boukkieO) and my girl (Slim))…Details of this ‘adventure’ coming to a blog near you (not mine!)
Life is funny you know. Somehow, disorganization seems to reveal who we really are. Guys, if you want to know that chic for real, wait till she’s in a messy situation. I saw chics who normally will strike me as those that never fart or eat beans and stuff. You know them now, they’re all over The palms…yeah! Those heel wearing, cat walking, BB pressing types. You should have seen what they morphed into…heels in hands, muttering words that had no semblance to their usual ‘yeah’ ‘finna’ and ‘innit’…stuff sounded like “iru ojo wo leleyii gaan” and if you as much as said ‘Hi’, you’ll get something like “ab’oloshi ni e nii?”
Babes were not smiling o! Brazilian hair and wigs gone ‘down the drain.’ haha! One lady’s wig developed a mind of its own and was far ahead of her in the flood..she was caught between the wig and the deep brown flood! Eventually, she decided to ditch the wig (some guy will remedy that afterall)… And for the guys, it didn’t matter if you were in a Range or a G-class, if it wasn’t a 180horsePowered, wooden interior, alloyed paddle CANOE, then you were not winning! You couldn’t pick the chics cos no one wants to push in the event you enter a hole or the car just stops.
*sidebar* I’ve ordered my neighborhood carpenter Monsuru (who sits in a corner wearing Dolce & Gabanna) to get on the canoe making job for me..i cant carry last!
Ok, at this point, I’m wondering where I’m going with this…errrmm..I should just stop, yeah? Yup! I thought so too! You could have told me earlier that you were tired though, *shrugs* ah well..wrapping up…I just wanna…oh fack it.