>The following takes place between 9am and 9.35pm..Events occur in real time…
Reason the events are occurring in such a long period of time is cos that’s how long it took me to complete the typing of this post, thanks to various occurrences such as PHCN outage which is a constant anyway, food break, toilet break, ping and Twitter breaks amongst others..if u are smart and sharp, u will discover that there was no girlfriend break or such..the reason isn’t far fetched, SCROLL down to the previous posts..and if ure feeling cool with urself at this point because u have a GF, don’t be too excited yet, wait till Feb 15th to rejoice…I’ve got a valentine post coming up and a lotta y’all will hate me after it but c’est la vie…
So wassup Utunnus (warreva that means), wats d koko? (warreva dat means), How’s ur sinzu? U know its amazing how we’ve just adopted these words into our lingo without knowing what they mean, if we were to write a dictionary, most of the words in it would have no definition! The world is becoming abbreviated lol…LWKM, LHKM, ish, appaz, ROTFLMAO, ROTFLMBBO, IHP4P, NHTTL…if u can decipher the last 2 words by the way, I’ll celebrate you in my next post..okies then, its been a drab kinda week for me..was down with fever caused by food poisoning earlier in the week but im back up cos u cant keep a good man down utunnu!! Shout out to all my tweeps that shouted out @ me @bleezers, @spitgucci @Msjazzyfied amongst others…u’re far too kind.
This post however isn’t about me (yellss I’m humble like that!), it’s a deviation from my normal (but I ain’t so normal so *shrugs*) I want to address an issue of serious economic importance that requires grade A consideration and observation, a situation that will not be given due hearing in the chambers of our judiciary but can and will be addressed here at the location of the convergence of this audience. its about a cankerworm that has eaten deep into the thick fabric of our society, its about the ‘disma pisma’ that erodes our very existence, an ‘incredible missile’ darris slowly wrecking apart one ‘kelly and some’ cohorts of his…*exhales* Ok, if at this point u still don’t know what im saying then u really should stop reading right now and #slap yourself..done? Good!! Scrolling through my TL during the week and I came across the story brewing up that Kelly hansome (?)
(why d guy no spell d handsome complete, im dey fear?) had come out with a diss track for MI…my first reaction was to smh..as in u know that kind of shaking when small pikin no wan hear word..yeah! that kind!! You know, I always remind you that this is MY blog and the opinions expressed here are purely mine ehen! Because im about to express another one and darris that whether u like it or not, MI and Kelly hansome no be mates as in not even the same class…u know d rest.
My 2nd reaction was “why won’t Oga Kelly just pick on someone his own size?” (pun intended
but sha, I really don’t understand when this is applicable..true o!) I think that the money Oga maga paid some years ago has finished..ehn no yawa naw! He should have decided to battle someone like ‘Konga’ or ‘Rasqie’ or better still met Oga Olu maintain to show him the way, by the way, there’s only one Kelly that me I know o and that’s R.kelly!..back to size, Oga Kelly had already entered d history books as one who ‘STOOD UP’ to MI in times past, why did he have to do it again?, now its becoming clearer that irrespective of height, MI stands head and shoulders far above Oga Kelly lyrically!!! Pls if u’re looking for fair hearing, u won’t get it here o, wait for @ifreke to do Twitter round up or watch 9’o clock news bcos im totally #TeamMi..don’t like eet? Do a Kelly hansome (shoot urself in the chest!)
So Oga Kelly writes on his Twitter page how his album has sold 5 million albums and is still selling 0_0 , me I’m like egbami o! really? Pls warris d name of d album o? cos d only hansome song I’ve heard is Maga don pay…Its not as if I don’t like Oga Kelly but if u wanna go head-to-head with MI, at least make sure you pack some punches. I got the link to the song and decided to DL it and listen for myself…you can DL it here:
Eventually after listening, I agreed with @ThelmaTweets who said she would have spent the 3:59secs picking her nose instead…I mean, where were the punches? Bash Ali would have done a better job abeg…“Yes I am kelechukwu, Kelly hansome is handsome…MI2’s so dumb, so many features on the album, wack tracks the outcome..how come?…Ur whole album sounds like a mixtape, Flavour on the track was ur only escape.. short like a maltina bottle, like wande im’ma make ur fat black ass model…” (yawns) He also took shots at jesse jagz, ice prince and Wande coal (who had sweetly put him in his place in the “who born the maga song”) re: “…Why u con dey find wetin no find u, put ur mouth for wetin no consign u, u be arsenal, omo I be manU , u con dey vex because we dey outshine u..i don’t wanna harm u, no be threaten, na d truth I dey yarn u…before my fans go gather up handle u, u go think say na molue jam u…”
I’m not one to shout wolf when there’s none! IMO, the first MI album was better than this, MI2 was greatly hyped and anticipated, me sef I join hype am on twitter and it trended, it doesn’t take away the fact that there are great songs on it (epic, imperfect me, wild west etc) I don’t think oga Kelly would have been able to pull it off even with d help of the Mo Hits hype man..(that fat guy that dances galala so well)..Well while Oga kelly’s album is still selling, MI just received a 20 million naira cheque for selling the marketing rights of the MI2 album not to talk about record sales and royalties…Bottomline of this post is this sha, I think Oga Kelly should concentrate on releasing an album we know about instead of trying to get cheap publicity by ‘attacking’ Choc Boys and Mo hits…MI should also realize the strategy and be smart enough not to be drawn into a word exchange…and we fans should sit back and be entertained whatever d case may be…by the way, at the time of this post, Kelly RANsome’s followers had increased to 1803 after the diss track, MI still has only 32,800+ Wish ’em both the best though but really again, Ogs kelly should ga’an diss konga and Rasqie to help their careers! (don’t count on it sha)
Here’s something to look forward to though, Feb 14th is around d corner, I know where im gonna be sha..home alone (yeah its Kevin baby!)..i’m gonna be doing a special (hopefully) on things to expect from your guys 4d ladies and things to get for your ladies 4d guys..these things range from excuses to gifts..BUHAHAHA (my evil laff)..so u can like to stay tuned for that and tell your friends abourrit as well.
Anyway, like I always say sha, those who come here to look for gbagauns to feed on, u sure will be constipated by the time u’re thru with this one…so quoting from the subject of the day “go boil stone, it will cure your sickness or maybe u should focus on your business” mtscheeew….
Comment o after reading before i “finish you boy/girl”